Tar and Abby

Friday, December 30, 2016


Time to post --

“Twas the night before Black Friday, when all the through the abode
The labs were stirring, even the one from a different zip code
The vomit was projected by the back door with unrestrained care
In the hopes that someone would arrive soon to help their despair
The adults and children were all startled out of their beds
As visions of WTF danced in their heads
And as we released the dogs to finish their puke attack,
We soon discovered they had more to do than just yak
When out on the lawn the labs began to seek sweet relief,
Everyone watched with curiosity that soon turned to disbelief
Like a flash it came out of their rears
A black toxic sludge that had them in tears.
The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow,
Gave a luster to these horrible objects below,
When what to our wondering eyes did appear,
A trail of oil from the turkey fryer used downstairs by the family’s engineer
We now knew why the labs were to the door so lively and quick,
They had in a moment been led astray by the temptations of a turkey oil slick
This Thanksgiving was one for the ages,
Now it was time to find the carpet cleaner in the yellow pages.”
– Matt Shifley


Sadie J said...

Those things you keep repeating "we'll laugh about this some day" in you head as you clean up the mess!

Bob Slatten said...

Love that! HNY TDM!

Jeanne said...

Hilarious!!! :o)

Mr. Shife said...

Happy New Year, Aunt Kathy and Uncle Jeff. Thanks for giving me the push to write that story.

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