Saturday, May 5, 2012
Abby wants to know - what is the function of a duck?
I've participated in several pond forums over the years.
Best post ever was a question about keeping a duck in your pond...
QUESTION: We have a man-made pond and wondered
if it is possible to buy baby duck to put at the pond?
ANSWER: Wooah Tina... Don't rush into this duck thing. I have a Peking, its a
beautiful white innocent thing that poops in
unbelievable quantities. Never mind about a bio-filter, you are going
to need a sewerage system suitable for a small town to deal with what
this duck is going to do to your pond.
QUESTION: would they stay or would they leave?
ANSWER: No need to fret on this account - ducks never take the hint. Chuck `em
it in the air and it'll come right back. Sure it will occasionally
wander out onto the highway, but motorists would rather run off the
road and kill all their passengers than hit a duck that's sitting looking
right at them. Look closely at the general design of your average duck,
notice that the cranium is small. It is my belief that if you could take all the duck
brains in the world and combine them in a sort of super organic
computer you would basically have a machine with a loose bowel and a
vocabulary limited to: "quack". A duck is a natural born lobotomy.---
QUESTION: Would we need to put a fence around it?
ANSWER: Sure, fence your duck, but it won't do you any good. You will still
hear screeching tires on the road and the neighbors will still phone you
up to say your duck is harassing their cat again. --