Tar and Abby

Monday, February 28, 2011

Dear Enjoy Life Natural Brands,

I have certain food issues (I won't bother you with) and decided to try your Chewy Bars (apple caramel flavor). OMG!! Someone is sabotaging your product! They are sneaking in the middle of the night and cutting your bars in half!!! I checked all the bars in the box (I really did!) and they've all been cut in half. WTH??

And then I notice, in 4 point type, a tiny, little, bitty statement. (It's to the right of the bar, the black blur.) The bar in the picture - it has been enlarged to show texture........ Texture. NO, IT WASN'T. It was enlarged to fool me into thinking that this box contained bars like all the other bars out there.

Is a terrible thing to do to us people with limited food options. And you charged me $3.99 for $1.995 of food.

Abby met her match?

On a Monday morning.
Abby comes in from the backyard with Ew-Du-Skunk dabbed behind her ears.
When GB wakes up we is getting a BATH!

Sunday, February 27, 2011

So nice the peoples installed these potties for us...

Flotilla of geese in the background. Picture from our paper, taken down on the river.

Saturday, February 26, 2011

Cell Phone Follies

Today The Engineer lost his cell phone. Could not find it. After much stomping around the house and creative cursing and damning of the fates, finally asked me to call his phone and I did.


"Um, dear.... yourself seems to be ringing..."


"WHERE?!?!?! I can't find it!!"


"Dear. YOU ARE RINGING. You, yourself, are/is ringing."


"AAARGH!!!" The Engineer turns out every pocket, pants, coat, shirt, finds it in his shirt pocket whilst Daughter and I were seriously in need of medical attention from laughing so hard.

Friday, February 25, 2011

Abby has a new nickname and occupation

From her second floor deck perch Abby keeps a close eye on all the neighbors.

One neighbor has earned the Wrath of Abby Fashion Police Dog.

The lady that takes her dog out whilest clad in her nighty.

Abby sets up a hectoring and lecturing barking and I have to try and sneak her back in the house while hoping the poor lady doesn't know, that I know, that she is outside, in full view, in her nighty - and that Abby is Horrified and Disapproves.

Tar, her minion and fellow fashion watcher and full time stoner, just sits beside her, grinning and enjoying the show, 'Hey, Mom, the sun, it makes the nighty transparent... should I go get GB?'

And I am hissing at them to get inside without being seen by Naughty Nighty Lady and waving the treat jar at them. Get. Inside. NOW!

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Abby allows a picture

Tar is a handsome lad

GB, in addition to being a computer overlord, is a photographer (taking after his uncle).
He got this picture of Tar today.

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Top Chef Redemption

I was kind of dreading Paula Deen. I watched her on Iron Chef and had to turn it off. Too much personality and laughing. Tonight - she was great. Very warm, thoughtful and a good judge.

So did Mike.I break Chef Law? Does deep fried mayo really taste that good? Did Top Chef earn redemption after last week? Did you tear up at the elimination?

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Abby has her own brand of Holy Water

Any other dog and the words, 'get out of the dishwasher or I'll get Mr. Squirt Bottle' stopped the behavior.
Abby loves Mr. Squirt Bottle so we renamed it Holy Water, Abby being a Demon Pixie and all, and thought that would help.
So I added about a tablespoon of lemon juice, put a warning label on the bottle and gently tried lemon water. She'll make a face but still likes to pit her wits against the Holy Water and her determination that I don't do a good enough job rinsing the dishes before they go in the dishwasher.

Sunday, February 20, 2011

Abby communicating with her master again...

The Engineer burning sticks that have fallen from the trees, been dug up by the dogs and appearing out of no-where. Abby skizzled her nose a bit and is now content to supervise.

Saturday, February 19, 2011

Abby's latest victim

I don't think it is radioactive.
I think The Engineer should take it out to work
and have it tested...
This stuff is what Abby removed from The Engineer's old, ratty easy chair.
A chair that desperately needs replacing.
Abby, Decorator Dog, has taken matters into her own paws.

Thursday, February 17, 2011

high fiber diet - Abby style

Tasty and nutritious.
Eat the household decor.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Top Chef All Stars

I liked the Muppet Challenge. It seemed like everyone was having a good time and I have a soft spot for CoCoMonner as he was known in our house.

Good thing because the Target Challenge was... awfully forced. Interesting was gathering all cooking materials from scratch. But I don't think food when I think Target (which is the why and wherefores behind the challenge). The up all night - tell me that was to preserve Target's bottom line and not for any added drama. All in all, not impressed.

Another point - why did Carla spend so much time with 'decor'. I would love to see the rules for this challenge. Was it a judging criterion that they just forgot about?

I. Still. Fit. Under. The. CHAIR!

Actually Tar had to grab her by the collar and pull her out.

birdies are singing

Always a good sign in February.

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Question - Who is Watson?

Watson is a computer. Watson is playing Jeopardy this week with some of the all time champions.

Last night Watson tied with one of the competitors. Tonight we are going to watch as
GB has to write a paper on the man vs. computer competition.

Answer - Run, run for your life. Question - What is the singularity, Dave?

Article here - Will Watson Crush Mankind?

Monday, February 14, 2011

too much la love

This is the time of year the skunks are out looking for love. Apparently it means a lot of olfactory activities at 2am.

Sunday, February 13, 2011

I'm so confused that I give up!

Fruits and vegetables may not be good for children!!! article here

Eggs are good for you! article here

Artificial sweeteners are worse than sugar! article here.

oh, my...

You can take a class in how to do this - anthropomorphic taxidermy.
Full story here

We've been treating stress all wrong...

Yesterday's wisdom: Never soothe yourself with food

Today's smart strategy: Treat yourself to chocolate

(I likes this one, very, very, very much)

Yesterday's wisdom: Turn to family and friends for support

Today's smart strategy: Cuddle up with your pet

(Puppies are on call, 24 hours a day, and are glad to be.)

Rest of the advice to be found here.

Saturday, February 12, 2011

Puppy Sunday

Abby finally outgrew her collar and now sports a new hot pink collar.

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

me and my little sister

Tar, 84 lbs, and Abby, 54 lbs, seven months old. She is a bit shy about showing her tail...

Sunday, February 6, 2011

Abby set her tail on fire...!

Abby finally got up and close to the fire, home of her Master, to set her tail ablaze.

As you can imagine all Hell broke loose.
Smoke coming from her tail.
Daughter yelling she could see burning embers in her tail.
GB and The Engineer chasing Abby to put out the fire.
Tar *helping* with encouraging barking, 'Go Abby Go!! Is this a new game?! I like the smoke!"
And then the smell of burning dog hair...

She lost some hair on her tail. The fire didn't burn her skin as The Engineer caught her in time. We opened the slider for some fresh air.

Her tail looks funny.

Gawd, what next?

I outgrew my chair...

Tar is seven months old and weighs 84 pounds.

PS - we are swearing off rawhide chewies - do terrible things to Tar's digestion and our peaceful nights.

Saturday, February 5, 2011

Anyone who can combine amphibians and dairy products

has my best wishes for the Super Bowl. Now, the most importantly, who wins best commercial and what snacks are you having??

Is it EVER a good idea...

to open something sealed for 15 million years???
Doesn't anyone watch old sci-fi movies on Saturday afternoon???

"Russian scientists are set to pierce through Antarctica’s frozen surface to reveal the secrets of an icebound lake that has been sealed deep there for the past 15 million years."

full story here

What is this??

Arriving in town this week.
answer here.

Thursday, February 3, 2011

I wonder if I can buy her soul back?

This copy of Shakespeare's plays is 127 years old.
I bought it in a used bookshop in actual Stratford Upon Avon, in actual England. I visited Skakespeare's home, went to the Merchant of Venice at the theatre and visited his grave site.

Tonight I heard a rrrrrip. I looked behind me and Abby was chewing part of the binding. I jumped up, maybe I could grab the piece from her and glue it back on.

She swallowed it.

Since she is the Demon Pixie - she was just following orders and "giving the devil his due".

Project Runway - is it my imagination

Or has Gretchen disappeared from the face of the planet?
I read Blogging Project Runway and they always have news of
every designer, Tim, Heidi and the judges - Gretchen has not
been mentioned at all lately.

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Top Chef, wait The Fashion Show?

The Fashion Show's Isaac Mizrahi judging a quick fire that didn't involve tasting....
Judging on plating is interesting but I think they should have tasted it too.
Oh, well, Bravo is putting its all behind a show that still hasn't jelled yet. Gotta give them credit for that.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Stay Calm?

I had this bookmark.
I loved this bookmark.
Today the puppies ate this bookmark...
I am no longer calm.